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Stephen Hopkins

Being Better Men.

"The Church is looking for better methods; God is looking for better men.”

--EM Bounds


I don't know exactly what's underneath it, but it seems like there are a great number of men in the world looking for answers on how to be...well...men. The same is true for women too. And I guess people generally. It's like we are living in an epochal shift, a gray zone (thanks, Mark Sayers, for that language) between eras. What will be in the digital and automated age is yet to be fully realized. But what was in the previous era is almost surely past. There's still a few people out there looking to become immortal cyborgs, but a great many folks want to know, very simply, how to be really and fully human.

A young John Wesley was struggling in his faith in the 1730's and came across a wiser, older Count Nicholas Ludwig von Zinzendorf. Wesley, ordained in the Anglican church and fresh off a failed mission trip to Georgia, was concerned that he wasn't even really a Christian Seeking Zinzendorf's counsel, he was told, "Preach faith til you have it." That particular advice resonates with the experience of a lot of wrtiers and teachers trying to write their way to a better life. In a lot of ways, I'm really no different.

I've felt a more pressing need recently to address men on how to be men. But it's not so much like I have all the answers (though I think I've got a few) as it is that I'm on the journey myself. And writing helps to clarify my thought and practice in daily life.

The quote from EM Bounds at the start of this post was a clarifying point in my own masculine journey. Again, Bounds isn't only speaking to men per se (he wrote in the 19th century where gender neutral language was not a thing) but it resonated with me. Sub out "church" for "the world" and it's still just as applicable. One of the massive mistakes people can make is to assume that Jesus is just a religious figure that I can put in a box on the side of my life. You know what I mean...I've got my "spiritual life" in one section, my "work life" in another, my "family life" over here, my "secret addictions" box on this side (oh...we're not supposed to talk about those?). The Lion of Judah isn't a tame house cat kept in a cage in your apartment. "The Earth is the Lord's and everything in it, the world and all who live in it." (Psalm 24:1)

The main point for all of us is that the Kingdom of God, which is the central message of Jesus, is just about reality. What Jesus teaches in the Sermon on the Mount for instance (Matthew 5-7) is just the way things are. And if that's true, then his teaching is applicable for anyone and everyone, regardless of your religious convictions or lack thereof. Of course, that's a separate conversation altogether...what do you actually call someone who trusts Jesus' teaching for their daily bread and desires to be his student in the school of life? This moves us into the territory of actual beliefs, not bumper sticker slogans and doctrinal checklists.

I think there is an ache and a yearning among many men today to be better men. And I also have a strong conviction that the best teacher in that endeavor is Jesus of Nazareth. He is, in my opinion, the wisest, strongest, and best man who ever lived. As important as it is to know your personality traits and have some rules around that (Jordan Peterson) or practice self-discipline (Ryan Holiday & the "modern stoic" stuff) or be thoughtfully engaging, enjoy cool stuff, and challenge the status quo (Joe Rogan), there is a more cohesive way to be a man in Jesus. To be clear, it's not that any of those guys are inherently bad. In fact, I think they're extremely popular for the aforementioned reasons. So feel free to listen away. It's just that in the quest to be better men, we can't lose sight of the one, truly good man who serves as the definitive and incarnated archetype for all of humanity - Jesus.

I hope that makes sense to you...this felt a bit rambly and maybe a little ranty. But it's something I intend to focus on in the coming year. So stay tuned if you think that's helpful. And even better, let me know what you think. Am I way off target here? Do I just need to go chop a tree or something? I am in a house surrounded by women after all...but really, let me know what's on your mind.

I'm praying for y'all and hope you make a great day!


--Steve


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