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Stephen Hopkins

What a Good Dad Must Do

"But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” (Matthew 1:20-21)


This last week, we were reflecting on the Christmas narratives in Matthew and Luke in our House Fellowship(1). My oldest daughter read them for us (she wouldn't be denied). And I noticed a contrast that I hadn't picked up before. Mary, of course, was to give birth to Jesus. Joseph was to give Jesus his name.

Just to be clear, the baby's name was going to be Jesus. Remember Zechariah, John the Baptist's Dad? His baby was going to be named John, no matter what; even if it required a divinely imposed muteness to get the message across. In the same way, this baby was going to be named Jesus. But it was up to Joseph to bestow that name upon him.

It struck me that we tend to ignore the responsibility Joseph has in the Christmas story beyond simply not divorcing Mary. He is given the task of bestowing the Name upon Jesus. Bibilically speaking (and in general I'd say), names are not insignificant. They're often identities, revealing the essence of who someone is.

To say that Joseph's job is to give the baby the name of Jesus means more than deciding what they'll call him. It means that Joseph is to foster in Jesus identity and purpose. He has the gift of forging in him a destiny for the Man he'll become.

It's a staggering responsiblity when you think about it. Joseph is the one to teach Jesus to be a man. Joseph is the one to teach him responsibility, calling, and vocation. Joseph is the one to model for Jesus how a man thinks, speaks, and acts. Joseph is the one to give him the Name at which every knee in heaven, on earth, or under the earth will bend. Joseph is the one to give him the only Name by which anyone can be healed.

This may seem obvious, but for all you Dad's out there (or those who one day may be Dad's), you can't give birth to your children. You can't breastfeed them. You can't maternally nurture your kids. And while there's a lot of things you can do, surely one of the most vital is giving them a name. And again, I'm not just talking about what you'll call them. Though what you call them is critical. Calling your kids names, or your wife names, or generally talking down to them is a blown opportunity and does more damage than you'd think. You, their Dad, set the foundation for the future. With the words that you speak to them and over them, you shape their destinies. With the life that you live and the character that you have, you represent what a Man is to your children. It's a holy and sacred responsibility that is generally undermined by a world deficient in understanding both holiness and responsibility.

As we head into Christmas and the New Year beyond, give your kids more than presents or experiences (or the crippling anxiety this time of year brings out of some of us). Give them their Name. And don't forget, this isn't a one time thing. It's a daily responsibility to remind them who they are and whose they are. Remember, Mary gave birth to Jesus. Joseph gave him his name.


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(1) If you're wondering what House Fellowship is, I'd love to talk with you about it. Essentially, the vision is an intergenerational community seeking to live as whole-life disciples and everyday missionaries with Jesus. In my view, it's an ecclesially sufficient church structure. But, in our case, it's made up of folks from the local church in which I serve. Anyway, that's enough for today, but reach out if you'd like to know more.


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